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THE MYSTERIES OF KALE

I may be a writer of mysteries, but I am also aware of mysteries in my everyday life. For example, last night, a friend came to dinner and raved about my kale.
This is a mystery to me. As the author of The Rebel Cook: Entertaining Advice for the Clueless(TouchWood Editions, 2006) I have established myself as a klutz in the kitchen. A klutz with a lot of laughs and charm, but no way a real chef.
So to have somebody actually ask for a recipe from me was a major event, worthy of a small parade, or at the very least, a glass or two of chardonnay.

So here, is my recipe for kale, shoplifted from other, real cooks, who know what they are doing.

THE REBEL COOK KALE:
Wash the kale well, and tear off all the little curly parts. Throw the stems away.
In a large skillet (I use non-stick) melt butter (or margarine) and olive oil until it is foamy. Add as much garlic as you can stand. And kosher salt. (A little goes a long way with kale.)
Don’t let the garlic burn (I always do and have to start over, oh bother, as Pooh would say) and then add the kale.
Stir it around so that it knows that somebody is watching. Cover it, and let it do its thing for a few minutes. Then check again, just so that it knows it can’t get away with anything.
After about one minute, it will turn a brilliant dark emerald green. In another few minutes, it will turn dark, dark green and start to become crisp. This is when you should turn off the heat, cover it, and pray with all your might that it is time to serve dinner.

People who hate kale love this recipe. Go figure. I always think I am lucky to get it onto a dinner plate, and I always, always have doubts that it is edible. But so far, the votes are pro-kale and pro-Rebel Cook. I am sure it is a hallucination on my part.

Comments (1)

One Response to “THE MYSTERIES OF KALE”

  1. Irene Black says:

    Sounds good to me, much like what we call wilted lettace-for a full meal try this.
    Fry up lb. of bacon, drain & set aside. I use paper towel in the microwave until last minute the transfer to skillet for just a tad of grease, add lettace or spinch (fresh, none of that frozen stuff, cover let wilt slightly, crumble bacon and sliced hard-boiled eggs then toss. Serve with either garlic french bread or corn bread sticks. If serving sticks make two batches as they won’t last.
    I have some ancient irons for sticks, the molds are no larger than your index finger. That takes three batches to have enough left to bring to the table.
    Next time I’ll try kale as it is one of my favorite winter greens. Thanks.

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